A Poem or a Song or Something

Disappointing red cups
held by disappointing people
I don't know what I stand for
or who is left to believe in anymore
But every photograph I see
that another one of my friends
loses one more thing in common with me
I don't know why, I can't explain it
but it makes me more sure
this was a choice worth making
and I made it for a reason
to stand for something I believe in
but not just when it's easy
ready to jump ship the moment your parents leave town
This may be obvious to you
but it's not so simple for me
A promise is a promise to the end
not until you are bored of the way you've been
I guess the part I don't understand is just
what made you change?
is it just the "coming of age"?
or an excuse to leave what we had behind
I have had this unshakable fear
that in a few years
all i will be to anyone
is the one you have to leave behind
when you go out at night
but at this point
i have given up
given up trying to change anyone
or on hoping that maybe someone will change their mind
if ever you should return
I will greet you with open arms
but now it's time to say goodbyes
and I can't say that I'm happy
but I will be waving with a smile

Late Night/ Early Morning Breakfast Walk

Me and my friend were up at about 4:45 this morning and I asked him if he wanted to go to IHop. I have never been to an IHop and there is one we can walk to through the woods. We tried calling to find their hours but got no answer. I knew there was a diner that was open 24 hours in West Hartford so we looked it up and it was simple enough. Only problem is it was an hour and eight minute walk according to google's direction by foot. Figuring we would still be back plenty before classes we decided to go anyways. After walking for a little under an hour talking about whether the or not we feel emotions we got to the diner and went in. A nice man in a multi colored shirt seated us and took our orders. I then heard the 6:30 news come on. For those unaware there has been a water scare around here and they have been saying do not drink well water. I was watching the screen looking at the woman about to report. She was standing in front of a West Hartford Restaurant. It was no other restaurant but the one me and Greg were in. I quickly turned around to look out the window and I saw the same woman standing in front of the camera telling the same story. Go figure. I finished my spinach and feta cheese omelet which was delicious and we headed back on our way home for which we were both more tired and heavier from the food we had eaten. At a cross walk on the other side of the road we walked back on I found a wet postcard on the ground. On the back it said , " From Daddy, Wish I was with you and I will always "love you". You will always be my best friend." One the front was a picture of a man and his song posing for a picture, the boy in front of the man. At first when saw the picture it appeared to be a soldier and his son and I wondered why it was left on an arbitrary street corner. After reading it again and looking at the picture, the mans uniform was one of a jail. Greg commented on how it was much more fitting it was left on the streets then. It was an interesting Start/End to a day to say the least. We got back to the dorm at 8, after leaving at 5. We only ate for 40 minutes. I have walked over 6 miles today and for about two and a half hours. Time to pass out.

BLOGBLOGBLOG

I suppose I need some form of introduction. My name is Ian. I make music among many other things. I want to be your friend. I have accounts on most sites on the internet under the name ianedgerly. Talk to me. Conspire with me. Invite me to your grandmother's birthday party. Let's do it.

Old Poems

I want to feel the weight of meaning, to feel my chest push down as she breathes back in response to my lungs collapsing from her head falling onto them.


She's standing on the crest of a shallow hill in a subtle black dress, I'm sad to say I had never looked up from my own two feet stuck in the snow all while admiring boring women in snow white gowns in our snow white town, and as the snow falls to gleam against their uniform attire, courting a thief or a liar, I'd like to fade off into the distant black woods, climb into the trees and forget any of this had ever happened.